Lasagna
La-la-la-la-lasagna
You want-a some-a lasagna, magnifico
Or a-maybe spaghetti
Ay, you supper's a-ready now, where you go?
Mama mia bambino
Mama mia bambino, 'samatta you?
'Samatta you, 'samatta you?
You should-a taste my lasagna
Ay, you no like-a lasagna
That's okay too
How about-a calzone
Some-a nice minestrone, atsa good for you
Have-a some marinara
Have-a some marinara, I know-a you like
I know-a you like, I know-a you like
La-lasagna
La-lasagna
La-lasagna
Would you like some-a zucchini?
Or-a my homemade linguini, it's hard-a to beat
Have-a more fettucini
Ay, you getting too skeeny, you gotta to eat
Ay, mange, mange!
Ay, you-a pass the lasagna
A-don't you get any on ya, you sloppy peeg
Have-a more ravioli
You-a get roly poly, a-nice and-a beeg
Like you cousin Luigi
Luigi, Luigi, capisce paisan?
Capisce paisan, capisce paisan?
La-lasagna
La-lasagna
La-lasagna
La-lasagna
Addicted to Spuds
Potato skins, potato cakes
Hash browns and instant flakes
Baked or boiled or french fried
There's no kind you haven't tried
You planned a trip to Idaho
Just to watch potatoes grow
I understand how you must feel
I can't deny they've got a peel
Wo, you like 'em whether they're plain or they're stuffed, oh yeah
Better face the facts, it seems you can't get enough
You know, you're gonna have to face it, you're addicted to spuds
Your greasy hands, your salty lips
Looks like you found the chips
Your belly aches, your teeth grind
Some tater tots would blow your mind
And you don't mind if they're not cooked
You need your fix, I guess you're hooked
And late at night you always dream
Of bacon bits and sour cream
Wo, you like 'em even if they're lumpy or tough, oh yeah
It's pretty obvious to me you can't get enough
You know you're gonna have to face it, you're addicted to spuds
Might as well face it, you're addicted to spuds
Might as well face it, you're addicted to spuds
Might as well face it, you're addicted to spuds
Might as well face it, you're addicted to spuds
Might as well face it, you're addicted to spuds
I'm giving up, it's just no use
Another case of spud abuse
What can I say, what can I do
Potato bug has got me, too
Wo, I used to hate 'em, now they're all that I eat, oh yeah
I've often seen 'em whipped, but they just can't be beat
Now I'm gonna have to face it, I'm addicted to spuds
I Love Rocky Road
I hear those ice cream bells and I start to drool
Keep a couple quarts in my locker at school
Yeah, but chocolate's gettin' old
And vanilla just leaves me cold
There's just one flavor good enough for me
Yeah me
Don't gimme no crummy taste spoon, I know what I need
Baby, I love rocky road
So won't you go and buy a half gallon baby
I love rocky road
So have another triple scoop with me
They tell me ice cream junkies are all the same
All the soda jerkers know my name
When their supply is gone
Then I'll be movin' on
But I'll be back on Monday afternoon
You'll see
Another truckload's comin' in for me
All for me
I'm singin', I love rocky road
So won't you go and buy a half gallon baby
I love rocky road
So have another triple scoop with me
When I'm all alone
I just grab my self a cone
And if I get fat and lose my teeth that's fine with me
Just lock me in the freezer, throw away the key
Singin', I love rocky road
So won't you go and buy a half gallon baby
I love rocky road
So have another triple scoop with me
Spam
Spam in the place where I live (Ham and pork)
Think about nutrition, wonder what's inside it now (oh boy)
Spam in my lunchbox at work (It's the best)
Really makes a darn good sandwich, any way you slice it at all
If you're running low, go to the store
Carry some money to help you buy more
The tab is there to open the can
The can is there to hold in the spam
Oh, spam on the table at home (Ham and pork)
Think about selection, are there different flavors now? (Let's eat)
Spam in my office at work (It's the best)
Think about the stuff it's made from, wonder if it's mystery meat
If you need a spoon, keep one around
Carry a thermos to help wash it down
Now if there's some left, don't just throw it out
Use it for spackle or bathroom grout, now
Spam in my pantry at home (Have some more)
Think of expiration, better read the label now (Oh boy)
Spam breakfast, dinner or lunch (It's the best)
Think about how it's been pre-cooked, wonder if I'll just eat it cold
Now once you start in, you can't put it down
Don't leave it sitting or it'll turn brown
The key is going to open the tin
The tin is there to keep the spam in
Oh spam, spam (Ham and pork)
Think about nutrition, wonder what's inside it now (Oh boy)
Spam, spam (It's the best)
Really makes a darn good sandwich any way you slice it
Spam in the place where I live (Have some more)
Think about addiction, wonder if I'm a junkie now (Let's eat)
Spam in the place where I work (You're obsessed)
Think about the way it's processed, wonder if it's some kind of meat
Spam in the back of my car (Ham and pork)
The tab is there to open the can (Spam any place that you are)
The can is there to open the spam (Spam any place that you are)
Oh spam
Eat It
How come you're always such a fussy young man
Don't want no Captain Crunch, don't want no Raisin Bran
Well don't you know that other kids are starving in Japan
So eat it, just eat it
Don't want to argue, I don't want to debate
Don't want to hear about what kind of food you hate
You won't get no desert till you clean off your plate
So eat it
Don't tell me you're full
Just eat it, eat it
Get yourself an egg and beat it
Have some more chicken, have some more pie
It doesn't matter if it's broiled or fried
Just eat it, eat it, just eat it, eat it
Just eat it, eat it, just eat it, eat it
Your table manners are a crying shame
Your playin' with your food, this ain't some kind of game
Now if you starve to death you'll just have yourself to blame
So eat it, just eat it
You better listen, better do what you're told
You haven't even touched your tuna casserole
You better chow down or it's gonna get cold
So eat it
I don't care if you're full
Just eat it, eat it
Open up your mouth and feed it
Have some more yogurt, have some more Spam
It doesn't matter if it's fresh or canned
Just eat it, eat it
Don't you make me repeat it
Have a banana, have a whole bunch
It doesn't matter what you had for lunch
Just eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it
Eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it
Just eat it, eat it
If it's getting cold reheat it
Have a big dinner, have a light snack
If you don't like it,you can't send it back
Just eat it, eat it
Get yourself an egg and beat it
Have some more chicken, have some more pie
It doesn't matter if it's broiled or fried
Just eat it, eat it
Don't you make me repeat it
The White Stuff
The white stuff
The white stuff
The first one was a sweet one
Second one was a blast
Soon I finished off the bag, ate 'em up real fast
You can see 'em in my teeth
Tell it when I talk
Had so many my pancreas just went into shock
I love the white stuff baby
In the middle of an Oreo
I love the white stuff baby
It's the most delicious thing I know
I've had a zillion or two
In my life, they're so right
My teeth are all rotted clear through
But who cares?
What else am I supposed to do?
I love the white stuff baby
In the middle of an Oreo
I love the white stuff baby
It's the most delicious thing I know
Oh oh oh oh oh, oh Oreo
Oh oh oh oh oh, the white stuff
Oh oh oh oh oh, oh Oreo
What's in the middle? The white stuff
The first time that I tried it
Got a big sugar buzz
Nothing gets me high as that sandwich cookie does
But I love the filling most
I rub it on my roast
Mix it in with my coffee and spread it on my toast
I love the white stuff baby
In the middle of an Oreo
I love the white stuff baby
Take some with me everywhere I go
Might get a pimple or two
Well, so what? It's all right
Now Twinkies and Ding Dongs won't do
All I need...You know what it is
Oh oh oh oh oh, oh Oreo
Oh oh oh oh oh, the white stuff
Oh oh oh oh oh, oh Oreo
What's in the middle? The white stuff
My Bologna
Oooh, my little hungry one
Hungry one
Open up a package of
My bologna
Oooh, I think the toast is done
Toast is done
Top it with a little of my bologna
Never gonna stop
Eat it up
Such a tasty snack
I always eat too much
And throw up
But I'll soon be back
For my my my yi yi wooo!
M-M-M-My bologna
Spreadin' on the mustard now
Show me how
Spread it on a little of
This bologna
Hopin' that we don't run out
Don't run out
If we do, I'm sure that I'll
Miss bologna
Never gonna stop
Eat it up
Such a tasty snack
I always eat too much
And throw up
But I'll soon be back
For my my my yi yi wooo!
M-M-M-My bologna.
Goin' to the market now
Market now
I'm the city's biggest
Bologna buyer
Walkin' down the shopping aisles
Shopping aisles
Fillin' up my basket with
Oscar Mayer
Never gonna stop
Eat it up
Such a tasty snack
I always eat too much
And throw up
But I'll soon be back
For my my my yi yi wooo!
M-M-M-My bologna
Taco Grande
Taco grande
Taco grande
Yo quero chimichangas y chile colorado (I want chimichangas and chile colorado)
Yo tengo el dinero para un steak picado (I have the money for a chopped steak)
Las flautas y tamale, siempre muy bueno (The flautas and tamale, always very good)
Y el chile relleno (And the stuffed pepper)
You see, I just gotta have a tostada, carne asada
That's right, I want the whole enchilada
My only addiction has to do with flour tortilla
I need a quesadilla
I love to stuff my face with tacos al carbon
With my friends or when I'm all alone
Yo tengo mucho hambre y ahora lo quiero (I am very hungry and now I want)
Un burrito ranchero (A ranch style burrito)
So give me something spicy and hot now
Break out the menu, what you go, now?
Oh, would you tell the waiter I'd like to have
Sour cream on the side
You better make sure the beans are refried
Taco grande
Taco grande
Well there's not a taco big enough for a man like me
That's why I order two or three
Let me give you a tip, just try a nacho chip
It's really good with bean dip
I eat uno, dos, tres, quatro burritos
Pretty soon I can't fit in my Speedos
Well, I hope they feed us lots of chicken fajitas
And a pitcher of margaritas
Well the combination plates all come with beans and rice
The taquitos here are very nice
Now I'm down on my knees, we need some extra
Tomatoes and cheese
And could you make that separate checks, please?
Taco grande
Taco grande
Buenos noches Senor Y bienvenidos al Enrico's Casa de Salsa. Tenemos muchos platos muy sabrosos. Se puedo recommendar el ardiente pollo al infierno. Muy delicioso. Sus ojos se quemaran. Se estomago estaran en fuego. Se quedaran en el bano por una semana. Entiendes lo que digo gringo estupido tonto?
(Good Evening sir, and welcome to Enrico(Richard)'s House of Salsa. We have many very delicious dishes. May I recommend the burning chicken from hell. Very delicious. Your eyes will burn. Your stomach will be on fire. You'll be in the bathroom for a week. Do you understand what I'm saying you very stupid gringo?)
Well the food is coming I can hardly wait
Now watch your fingers, careful hot plate!
What you think you're doing with my chili con queso?
Well, if you want some, just say so
Oh boy, pico de gallo
They sure don't make it like this in Ohio
No gracias, yo quiero jalapenos, nada mas (No thanks, I want jalapenos, nothing else)
You can toss away the hot sauce
Donde estan los nachos? Holy frijole! (Where are the nachos? Holy frijole!)
You better get me a bowl of guacamole
Y usted, Eugene? Wh's your face turning green?
Don't you like pinto beans?
You want some more cinnamon crispas?
If you don't, hasta la vista
Just take the rest home in a doggie bag if you wanna
You can finish it manana
Well, it's been a pleasure, I can't eat no more
Senor, la cuenta, por favor (Sir, the bill please)
If you ain't ever tried real Mexican cooking, well, you oughtta
Just don't drink the water
Taco grande
Taco grande
Taco grande
Taco grande